Football in the Church

BLOCKING:           Talking endlessly to the pastor at the church door and
                    keeping everyone else from exiting.
DRAFT CHOICE:       The decision to sit close to an airconditioning
                    vent.
END ZONE:           The pews.
EXTRA POINT:        What you receive when you tell the preacher his
                    sermon was too short.
ILLEGAL MOTION:     Leaving before the benediction.
INTERFERENCE:       Talking during the organ prelude.
TWO-MINUTE WARNING: The pastor's wife looking at her watch in
                    full view of the pastor.
QUARTERBACK SNEAK:  Sunday School teachers entering the building
                    five minutes after classes began.